My mind is not the same as it was, 15 years ago. When I was younger, I was brainwashed to believe that you can do anything you put your mind to. Brainwashed to believe that anyone could achieve the American Dream. I used to say that I wanted to get married, be an OB/GYN in the Air Force, have 3 children & have a 3-story house with an indoor swimming pool & jacuzzi. I ended up majoring in Spanish & got a Bachelor's degree, & still didn't get to get any jobs as a translator. I was brainwashed to participate in consumerism, as well.
After finding out the truth & experiencing certain things, I no longer chase after being rich. Due to me being a Targeted Individual, my life did not turn out the way that I expected. Being on forced low income for many years, receiving under $700/month for most of my adulthood life, being blacklisted from employment, being forced into the mental health system, & being homeless off & on, was not how I dreamed of my life to be when I was 12 years old. I had NO CLUE that living the American Dream required you to sell your soul to the devil. If I could turn back the hands of time, I wish I would've never wasted any of my life, going to college. 1 of my BIGGEST regrets! 1 of the best decisions I've made in my life was to leave the cult & the mental health system & become a Christian.
If someone sent me $1 million at 38 years old, I would do different things than I would've done with it 15 years ago. Yeah, 15 years ago, my biological family members would've tried to parasitically rob & drain me out of EVERY PENNY like they did with my student loan money. I would've generously given some of the money to my family members, being merciful. (I wasn't aware of the Gang Stalking & narcissistic abuse back then.) Then, I probably would've spent that money, traveling the world. I probably would've been driving around in a luxury SUV. I bet more men would've sexually wanted me. I probably would've had better physical appearance. I guess I would've been more vain & foolish with the money spending.
With a 1-time payment of a million dollars, I probably would've been broke by now, since money doesn't last forever. Back then, it wouldn't have crossed my mind to start a business, invest or open up a restaurant with that money, since the former foster mom had us overly sheltered & ignorant of how the world operates. She didn't really teach us much of anything. She waited until after we made a mistake, to yell at us, berate us & condemn us, calling us stupid.
Today, if someone would've sent me $1 million (without me selling out), as a 6-month experiment to see how I would spend it, I would (first & foremost) pay back EVERY penny of debt that I owe. Then, I would buy me a small, inexpensive 1 bedroom house. I would stock up & prepare. Be a prepper. No one would be invited to my house because I can't trust folks, due to this Gang Stalking. I wouldn't try to buy a bed or any furniture. I would just buy a mattress because, hey, I've slept on just a mattress for many years, due to being poor. I would buy me a new Nissan Murano or a Toyota Highlander. Nothing luxury. But I would like to pay for a 1-time opportunity to drive a luxury vehicle, just for the experience. I never got to drive a luxury vehicle before. I would secretly give generously to others less fortunate than me & not donate to any mainstream charities. Maybe donate to other people in need on GoFundMe, GiveSendGo, or other fundraisers. I also would secretly give money to homeless people on the streets, while they're sleeping & not aware that it was me. I would give back.
1 thing about me. I can't stand to see others suffering. I love to try to help others whenever I can, if I know how to. I'm very generous & giving. Narcissistic Abusers shun me for giving, saying that I give too much.