I'm Always Expected To Be "Positive"

Smh! Just like this situation. Look at the bottom of the post of the link to see what I'm talking about.


https://gangstalkedcreoleauthor.blogspot.com/2022/07/ocd-homelessness.html?m=0


I've been thinking about this topic for about a week. I started to work on it late this morning. Soon as I started working on it, I had a DISASTER day on Twitter. I guess people thought my tweets were too "negative" & "annoying". I lost at least 5 followers + I had to block someone. & guess what. 2 of them were so-called "Targeted Individuals". Evelyn Dench & Shaniece A. I don't know why they unfollowed me. & the fake Shaniece person was talking about staying prayed up. Yet, she's dumb enough to tweet at our fake "president" Biden to help Targeted Individuals! He's destroying the damn country! (You can tell that I'm VERY pissed today!)

So yeah, when I started working on the post about OCD & homelessness on 4th of July, I was in the middle of working on it (I didn't even tell anyone about it yet) when the owners from AJ's convenience store in downtown Pensacola started to harass me about cleaning & sanitizing everything. & she was perping with the red, too. Her name is Judy, & her husband's name is Allen (or Alan?). 

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So, here's my post about "positivity". People call negativity "toxic", but I've heard that there's a such thing called "toxic positivity". I heard that toxic positivity is New Age & another form of narcissistic abuse. These fake delusional New Agers know DAMN WELL that they even have bad days, sometimes. 

Damned if I do, damned if I don't. 



(This post turned out to be longer than I intended. I thought it was going to be just brief.)



I understand that other people have had a series of unfortunate events or a bad life, too. This wicked world that we live in. 

On Twitter today, I said this:

The answer/response is how a typical narcissistic abuser would respond. Like as if I'm dumb, without common sense.

I asked 

Q: How do you deal with someone who treats you like you don't have a right to speak about your past traumas & abuses?

Someone answered

A: You place them on ignore and share what you want! 

Other people do not have the right to tell you how or what to speak! Nor do they have the right to infringe on your right to participate in society or social media! 

They do have the right to go away and not listen! That is it!



Her tone + all those exclamation points. She sounds as if she's taking up for & defending me, but it's how she said it. Maybe I overreacted & took her intentions the wrong way, because I was already angry. But that's how typical narcs talk to me. Some people say, "It's not what you say, but HOW you say it." I don't always agree, though. Sometimes, it is WHAT you say.





So lately, a few acquaintances, whom I talk to frequently, always ask me how I'm doing. If I had a bad day, they get mad, walk off & cut the conversation. They're fake & 2 faced. They go behind my back & gossip & laugh, talking about how my cooking sucks or that my short stories are silly. They only wanna hear what they perceive to be good news. But it can't be something that makes ME happy! It has to be what makes THEM satisfied! 

Even in the past, I've dealt with narcissistic control freak fake "friends" who ONLY want me to be "positive" & talk about "positive" things. Do you know how HARD that is, being a lifelong trauma & abuse sufferer, especially being a targeted individual, & every good & successful thing you try to do gets sabotaged & hindered because of the gang stalking? Those SAME narcissistic abusers who claim they want me to be "positive", saying that I'm too negative, energy-draining & complain too much, are the same ones who shun, ostracize & berate me for doing what makes me happy. 

Remember when I told y'all that I would be forbidden to talk about Aaliyah, listen to her music, watch her movies, wear her T-shirts, etc.? Yet, the perps can do it every day! I'm forbidden to discuss Aaliyah, yet when I look up, THEY can talk about her! Even though I don't listen to her music or watch those movies anymore, this is something that was & still is forbidden. Like as if I blasphemed the Holy Spirit because she crossed my mind. Well, OF COURSE she would cross my mind, if you're wearing her T-shirts in front of my face or blasting her music with loud subwoofers, dumb ass!

I'm forbidden to talk about things that make me happy. Those topics are off limits in a conversation. I'm forbidden to talk about swimming, going to the beach, driving, eating my favorite food, writing short stories, etc. Forbidden to talk about my favorite Christian songs, the Bible, survival, prepping, natural health, birthdays, the New World Order, exposing any truth, talking about my traumas & targeting, trying to get closure & heal, etc. I would get condemned if I were to take a weekend vacation to my hometown New Orleans. Feeling homesick. I would get berated for even getting myself a mini-cupcake for my birthday because I don't even deserve THAT, according to the fake narcissistic psych world. If I was a guy who talked about having a vintage baseball card collection, they would nip it in the bud & force muzzle me. No one would be interested in hearing about me talking about vintage baseball cards. A fake narc friend could share the same common interest with the baseball card collection, but just doesn't ME to talk about it!

At the beginning of the fake COVID-19 scamdemic, I noticed on YouTube that people would thumbs up or thumbs down my video, based on how positive or negative the topic is. (Other targeted individuals show footage of their gang stalking experiences & don't get graded or judged like that.) They STILL do that to me, with both the videos & the community posts! But at the same time, there would be moments where I would show a happy 30-second clip of the clear water & waves. Or after the rain, I could post a 2-minute video of of natural real life nature sounds of crickets, frogs & birds. Even a video of myself feeding the squirrels. & I would get MASSIVE thumbs down. Like, DAMN! What was so negative, wrong or offensive about those 3 things? But they're frickin' jealous perps! 

Even narcissistic gang stalking mentally slow, crazy biological family members treat me like that. Especially fake, crusty Pete, that mentally off, slow, retard Ramona & that retarded AIDS fag Mark! But they're using projection. I could talk about a good day that I've had, & Mark would get an attitude & walk out of the room. Or, he would make up a lie for an excuse to get off the phone with me. Mark & Ramona were always about trying to gain perp Intel on me. Always wanting to talk about what foolishness they don't want to hear. Talking about me being full of drama, yet they start false rumors behind my back! They love to try to frame & set me up for irreversible, lifelong failure & destruction!

I had to realize that them calling me "negative" is them using projection on how THEY feel about ME! I'm never positive or good enough for them. I got a certain age & quit trying to people please. I started cussing people out!

Oh yeah! & remember when I told y'all that everyone else has rights, but me?