Throw Me Some Lagniappe

Ken, a 14-year old, was very excited to go to his 1st Mardi Gras parade. He came from Chicago to New Orleans with his parents, Marty & Rita. They rented a cheap Airbnb at someone's house in Terrytown. They opted to take no rental cars, taxis or Uber. Just buses, streetcar & ferry. They knew that Mardi Gras can get very expensive. They wanted to be as cheap & frugal as possible. The parents told Ken to pick only 1 parade, since they wanted to explore other activities, such as the Audubon Zoo & Aquarium, City Park, the Pelicans basketball game & also do some personal self-guided sightseeing tours. They ended up just going to City Park & the museum in the free day. 

Ken tried to be slick & choose Sunday, February 19, 2023, so that he could get 3 or 4 parades in a row. He wanted to go to Krewe of Okeanos, Krewe of Mid-City & also Krewe of Thoth, as well as Krewe of Bacchus. His parents weren't having it. He was also trying to get out of his parents trying to make him go to the Catholic church services on that Sunday. 

On the Friday evening of February 17, the family was invited to a King Cake Social in Houma, where the Airbnb host, Donna Perkins invited them to go. At the King Cake Social, there was a GIANT king cake, that everybody feasted off of. That 1 king cake had sections of 20 different flavors on a bunch of tables put together. Everyone was able to sample whatever flavors they wanted. There was also some boudin, gumbo & a dish with white beans served over shrimp & sausage jambalaya. Everyone was complaining that the gumbo was nasty, that the shrimp & sausage jambalaya was too spicy, & that the white beans were too salty. But the boudin was gone within seconds! Ken tried to drink up all the Barq's Red Creme Soda, but his parents caught him in the act & made him take only 1 can. Everyone loved the king cake. Ken & his family kept feasting on the cream cheese pecan praline flavored portion, while Donna was feasting on the blueberry flavor. 

Ken was disappointed because he wanted to go to those 4 parades on Sunday, but his parents made him go to Krewe of Endymion on that Saturday, the 18th. Endymion was the perfect choice, because Donna knew some of the float riders who would give her extra goodies. Marty & Rita mistakenly thought that the parades costed money, but they're free to attend. Maybe that's why they tried to restrict Ken to only 1 parade. Also, they wanted to go to church. 

Endymion parade time came on Saturday at 4 PM, & the floats started rolling in. You can hear people chanting, "Throw me something, mistah!" But when Donna's friends on the floats saw her, she would yell, "You know who I am! Throw me some lagniappe!" People were stunned at how she was getting so many stuffed animals, moon pies, gooey cakes, lingerie, doubloons, fancy beads, cups, etc. She was getting it ALL! Ken & his parents couldn't catch any beads or cups, to save their lives! They were getting low-key jealous. There were people who kept jumping in front of Ken, Marty & Rita, every time they tried to catch beads. 

The crowd got bigger, crazier & stronger. People started pushing, shoving & fighting. A drunk man threw an opened, full beer can at Rita. Rita was angry & wanted to leave immediately. But she couldn't leave because it's hard to get out of the crowd until after the parade is over. She also had to go pee really bad. She got lost. Every place she tried to go pee, was overly crowded. & everyone had to pay $10 to use the restroom at certain bars. It was worse when everyone tried to get down to Canal Street. 

The parade was almost over, & they finally got to go potty at Popeye's for free. (What a relief!) When they walked onto Bourbon St., they eyewitnessed deplorable debauchery & depravity. You would've thought it was a riot going on. There were Christian street preachers quietly holding up signs, condemning both Mardi Gras & the Catholic Church. The family thought twice about what they thought was their Christian faith. They needed a spiritual re-evaluation. 

Everyone finally made it back to the Airbnb. Donna apologized profusely. She realized that Mardi Gras & Bourbon St. aren't everyone's cup of tea. The family packed their bags & headed back to Chicago. On their flight, they did some serious reflecting. They had a wakeup call & left the Catholic Church & pagan, Satanic Mardi Gras for the REAL Jesus Christ. They forsook their worldly ways.

THE END